We Play to Stay Happy

by Holly on October 2, 2012

I’ve always heard that the couple that plays together stays together. In the last few years, my fiancé and I have put play as a priority in our life together and have seen it pay off. Despite the challenges of balancing work, school, our relationship and other responsibilities, being intentional about taking time to relax together has brought us even closer.

Exercise

We love to exercise together. As we run, hike and bike, we push each other to stay in shape. Although we don’t always want to exercise every day, we can lean on each other for motivation. And we love the benefits of our healthy lifestyle. We feel better physically, and we have more stamina to excel at our day jobs.

These physical fitness activities also help us relieve stress. After a hard day at work, a bike ride or run is the perfect way to release tension and calm down before we prepare for bed. It can even help blow off steam when we feel a fight coming on.

Video games

I’ll admit it: we’re complete nerds when it comes to video games. As often as possible, we play Madden, Call of Duty and other games on our beloved PS3.

While we appreciate the opportunity to play and compete together, we also notice that video games give us the chance to troubleshoot our relationship. As we’re playing, a certain game might trigger a recent argument, and we can pause the game to talk about the issue. Other times, a casual comment sparks a heated discussion, and we work out our aggression in the game before falling on the sofa in a fit of giggles. It sounds silly, but playing actually opens the door to better conflict management, and we often use video games to reconcile after an argument.

Cooking

Somebody has to cook dinner every night. Instead of making it feel like a chore for one of us, we decided to cook together. Every weekend, we take turn planning the menu, then we make a list and shop together.

When it’s my turn to cook, my fiancé cleans up, and vice versa. With our shared responsibility, we feel like a team, and we enjoy talking about our day and flirting as we cook our favorite meals and try new dishes in the kitchen.

Reading

As avid readers, we decided to start our own miniature book club. We take turns picking the book, and we appreciate holding intelligent conversations as we discuss different perspectives on issues and topics. Although we often read at different speeds, we try to meet once a week to discuss the book and grow closer together.

Adventures

At least once every two months, we plan mini-day dates or a weekend trip where we try new things. One month, we went rock climbing. Another month, we hiked around a local lake. As we work together to figure out how to complete the challenge or conquer the task, we discover greater intimacy. We also both appreciate the opportunity to escape our daily routines and prioritize play on our mini adventures.

I know many couples lose sight of play as they deal with pressure from work, bills and other responsibilities. We have found that play enables us to get through all those other stresses in life. It keeps us united, helps us communicate and gives us a chance to relieve stress. My fiancé and I encourage our friends to make time for play, and we’re always looking for new things to try. What are your relationship-strengthening play tips that keep you happy as a couple?

Holly

Holly is a graduate student working towards her doctorate in literature and a newly-engaged fashionista! She also navigating engaged life with an equal amount of success and mistakes. She spends her time planning a wedding, planning a home and trying to find out which box she put her pink bunny slippers in. Holly's feet are cold. She blogs at Belts and Bangles, on behalf of Sears and other brands she loves

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